Down Then Up

Seems like a good moment to read some of my book, which I probably will after I iron some clothes. I'm using this weekend for me. Anything I do must not involve anyone else or be for them.

It is TOM for me and I don't know if that contributed to it but yesterday I felt like I was at my lowest. I had trouble sleeping the night before and woke up with a headache. I sitll have a slight one even though a day had past. At once every hurt, anger, and all the bad moments came back at once. I was hurting for every lie told ever told to me. I didn't deserve it. I wanted to scream but I cried instead. When I woke up, at work, driving in the car, etc.

I always feel like I'm holding myself up at the seams. I need to cry out the hurt but have no idea how deep it goes. Once I say, I'm hurt because of this then I realize I only was hurt because of something else that happened. Everyone says to let it go and I always think I did. I'm just always reminded when another hurt shows.

But anyway, now I am back to my original self. I just came from a comedy show and laughed until I just about cried. I definitely had to catch my breath at one point.